Everybody's free to Wear Sunscreen

I was reminded of this song (or is it spoken word?) with an unforgettable lyrics when a friend posted snippets of it on his FB wall. So I googled it, and I found out that the lyrics was actually lifted from the column of Mary Schmich in the Chicago Tribune.

The song talks about life reminders (in imaginary bullet points) and I remember how I liked it so much. I was thinking, these are the words of wisdom I'd like to pass on to my kids. (i think i had zaki then already. because i remember hearing this song in our revo. zaki came before the revo.)

I also got smitten even by its simple yet overlooked one-worders ("Floss").

Plus I guess I have this infatuation for 'bullet points'. I think it's a great invention. It makes ideas easier to digest, especially for people who have no patience and skill to mine them from lengthy paragraphs. 
But I digress.
Here's the sunscreen song:

"Wear Sunscreen"

Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '98: Wear sunscreen. 

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

• Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine. 
• Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blind side you at 4 PM on some idle Tuesday. 
• Do one thing every day that scares you. 
• Sing. 
• Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours. 
• Floss. 
• Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself. 
• Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. 
• Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements. 
• Stretch. 
• Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't. 
• Get plenty of calcium. 
• Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone. 
• Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's. 
• Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own. 
• Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room. 
• Read the directions, even if you don't follow them. 
• Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly. 
• Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. 
• Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future. 
• Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young. 
• Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. 
• Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. 
• Travel. 
• Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders. 
• Respect your elders. 
• Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out. 
• Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85. 
• Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth. 

But trust me on the sunscreen.

She

She doesn't know it, but to me she's the most enlightened parent in the world.  I wouldn't even want myself (especially my teenage self) for a daughter but I think she handled me pretty well.  In the hands of a less capable parent, a stubborn, reckless, insecure teenager like I was would self-destruct in no time. But I came through, if I may say so myself.

She has always been a selfless parent.  She let neither her fears hold me back nor her expectations define me. She let me live my life, even if I wasn't worthy of that kind of trust.  That's because she had no illusions about living my life for me; and because she was ready to bear whatever the consequence, the likeliest being disappointment and heartbreak.

When the disappointments did come, she indulged some tears but kept her trusting stance.  Thankfully, I eventually managed to grow up.  More important,  I have come to love my life, warts and all, with no regrets, bitterness and what-ifs.  And that, I hope, made her heartbreaks even just a little bit worth it.

My life is blessed because of the life that she has been living: that of sacrifice, unconditional love and faith.  My life is unfolding the way it is because of the prayers she keeps in her heart.

If I can make my heart as big and brave as hers, develop discernment as deep as hers, blessed even more are my husband and children.

Happy birthday Ma!

take two

i don't have anything in particular to write about right now.  but i need to post something because i've been making it a point to do an entry a week.  and i can't afford another area of dismal performance because i have already been feeling like an epic failure with my NY list.

so sorry so soon, right?   i also can't believe it, as i watch myself violating my list day after day after day since the time i wrote it, and it's not even February yet.  the resolve is not supposed to wane this early.  and to think i felt my list was such a baby. you know, sleep early, be on time, wear make up...  chicken, right? apparently not for me.  

how about you?  hope you're faring much better than i am.  (or lucky you if you didn't make a list)

i should have probably just stuck with the one-word theme for the year like i used to. sounds simpler.  it's like setting a guiding principle of what you yearn to master for that year. it's just a theme, so it's hard to tell if you're keeping/doing it or not (guilt evasion scheme). but your gut will tell you. guts don't B.S.

so mine last year was authenticity: to know my self better, enjoy that self, be really that self.   but as you can see, i have managed to come up with a loong list of things i need to change about myself last Jan 1.  so i guess i failed in my quest for authenticity too haha*  (just let me wallow in this sense of failure.  i can take this)

but i still want to have a theme for this year,  or make it two coz i'm retaining authenticity.  i was thinking of 'Depth'.  that's the word that popped in head while i listened to my pastor's sunday talk.  i was thinking: i love this church, i love how it re-focuses me to the essential matters of life, i love how it makes me want to become a person with a sense of mission and meaningful burdens.

then i realized i like it when i connect to my deeper self, when i'm not too engrossed with the mundane.  i want to have that not only when i'm in church. i want that to be a mainstay feeling.

but then Monday beckoned.

you know Mondays. they're not cuddly like Sundays.  and unfortunately, i need to contend with, like, 4 mondays a week (i'm counting out friday).

you also probably know how it's a challenge to stay in touch with the deeper self in an 8 to 5 work setting. so much stimuli.  so by barely mid-monday, i slide back to mundane.  at the rate i'm going, how could i possibly do deep 7 days a week?

maybe i don't really want deep (cop out!)

maybe i just want to be kinder.  to be consistently and effortlessly kind.  because i hate it too when i b*tch. it's so lowly.

kindness. it's warm and fuzzy and has more practical use in the world than depth.  you can even kill with it.

authenticity + kindness. maybe this is what my loong chicken list really is all about.

(Photo not mine. stumbled upon it 2 years ago while surfing aimlessly)

* at this point, i can imagine my mother saying: but you're still being yourself. you're just trying to become your best self. 

the grocery store

if i haven't yet, then let me tell you now i love grocery stores (especially the specialty ones).  i could stay there the entire day going through every aisle, skimming every brand of coffee, chili sauce, dark chocolate, body wash, tea, and other quirky stuffs.   this infatuation should be harmless except that the longer I stay there, the longer my list becomes with mostly i-just-realized-i-need-this items. you could imagine the husband not being pleased at all.

I make it a point to visit grocery stores in every place i visit.  i feel like a local when i'm inside one, wherever that may be.  and there's always a lot of interesting stuff in there, things not sold back home (like a carton of egg whites, would you believe?)

and it's good to know i'm not the only one out there who loves grocery stores. sara my sis does, too. she's particularly fond of Trader Joe's. good stuff.

what's your favorite store?

the obligatory new year's list

Sleep before 9:30pm
Walk for 1& 1/2 hours everyday, am and noon
Take the stairs always
Eat only fruits for breakfast
No sweets, unless it's dark choco bar (at least 70%)
No pork, unless it's lechon
Wake up no later than 5am
Pray right before sleeping and right after waking up
Check Facebook on weekends only
No complaints, no judgment
Listen more, talk less
Seek to understand everyone
Speak only kind words about anybody. Keep harsh opinions to self
Wear make up
Add more colors to wardrobe
Get pedicure every other week, facial once a month (may budget ba?)
Use up a bottle of body lotion down to the last drop (coz i usually ditch it even when it's not even half)
No shoe purchase until October
No bag and make up purchase for the year
Buy good quality only
No gadget purchase for the year
Optimize and enjoy whatever's available
Tithe religously
Visit Sagada wih the entire family
Climb Mt. Maculot
Visit Hundred Islands
Be on time for everything, particularly for work
Read to zion and pray with the kids every night (walang mintis)
Cook saturday lunch and dinner (ok, kahit lunch lang)
Prepare menu for the entire week and actually stick to it
Purge closet and shoe cabinet
Stick to our grocery budget
Prettify the backyard patio
Learn German
Write thank you notes
Give marvin back rubs, even when he doesn't ask for it


whew, and this isn't even as exhaustive as i feel it should be.  such a long way to my better self, but should be getting there.   


Happy 2011!